Kingdom Hearts For Dummies 2
by TheMasterLink
Summary: Finnaly the long awaited sequal to Kingdom Hearts For Dummies, now staring.... J.K Rowling and Harry Pothead as guest stars! Also with Min the pirate captain and a cat named Misty! YAYY MISTY TIME!
1. ARRRGGHHHH

...It all began with...something!...uhh...the sands of time-no...ummm...a mushroom-no...ummm...yes a kid named Sora! Or something!

Sora-Hey Riku!

Riku-Hey Sora.

Sora-You know how the author dumped us off like five months ago.

Riku-Yeah.

Sora-Hes giving us a story line!

Riku-...

Kari-Is that good?  
Riku-No...He WILL mess it up with crappy jokes about me you and Sora.

Sora-Yay!

Kari-Not yay.

Riku-Hey...look a ship!

Kari-Yeah! Headed for destiny islands!

Sora-We are on destiny islands.

Kari-Doh'!

Riku-What'd I tell you?

First mate-AHOY!

Riku-Shut up.

Pirate Captain Min-HARHARHARHARHARHARHHARHAHRHARHAHRHAHRHARHAHRAHARHRAHRHHRAHRHAHRHARHAHRHAHRAHRHAHRHAHRAHRHAHRAHRHAHRHAHRHAHRHAHRHARHRAHHRAHRRHAHHRAHRARHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRHRAHRHAHRAARHHRAHRAHRAHRAHARHRAHRAHARHARHARHRAHRAHRHAHRAARHRHAHARHARHRAHARHRAHRAHRAHRAHARHRAHRAHRAHRHRHRAHARHRAHARHARHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHARHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHAHRHRAHRAHRAHARHRHRAHRAHRHARHHRAHRHARHRAHRAHRAHARHARHRHRAHAHRHAHRAHRHAHRAHH!  
Riku-He was laughing like a full minute there.

Sora-I can beat that! HARHARHARHARHAHARHSARHAHRHAHR-

Kari-Sora...ZIP IT!

Min-Arrggghhhh...shiver me captain -hat thingie!

Sora-I think you got that wrong. Its shiver me timber-

Min-ARRRRRRGGGGHHH! Ye be on a murderous wanted sign!

Sora-Where?

Min-Right over there!

Min pointed to a sign that said: Sora. Wanted for attemping to blow up the universe.

Sora-I NEVER-

Min-YE BE COMING WITH US YE YODDLEBELLYED LOG LUBBERS!

Sora-This is bad.

Min took Sora and threw him on the ship.

Sora-Guys?  
Riku-Ja?

Sora-When I die dont come to my funeral.

Kari-Ok.

So the ship set sail and Kari and Riku were alone.

Riku-FINNALY THAT IDIOTS GONE!  
Kari-We have to save him...

Riku-Comon! 5 minutes?  
Kari-Ok.

So they cheered and cheered not knowing what was going on in mins ship...which illl show right now.

Min-Sora!

Sora-Yo.

Min-Ye be mezzing wid the pirates?

Sora-I said I wanted a bucket of water to drink from!

Min-Oh Ok.

Min got up and went for a bucket.

Sora-Isnt that the bathroom bucket?

Min-Uhhh...err...no.

Sora-YES IT IS! VENGENCE!

Sora broke out of his chains and punched min.

Min-You wont like me when im angry.

Sora-Hulk spoof...original.

Min threw a chain at Sora which wrapped around his arm (see case of Prince Of Perisa: The Two Thrones to see it on the dark princes arm).

Sora-IVE SEEN THIS IN THE GAME BEFORE!

Min-Well then. You dont know what'll happen now.

Sora-Yes I do! Ill transform and crush you!

Min-Nope.

--------------------

5 minutes later at the plank thing pirates go "WALK THE PLANK". Yeah...

--------------------

Sora-Ummm...Do I get my lawer?  
Min-Playing smart with me eh?

?-Stop!

Min-ARGGHHHHHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHH-chokechokechoke!

Sora-:D

?-Sora! Its me! Donald!  
Sora-Crap.

Donald flew through the air in the gummi ship only for it to run out of gas and fall into a circle of great white sharks.

Donald-Well darn.

Min-Darn yeself!

No back to Riku and Kari.

Riku-WE STOLE A SHIP! TAKE THAT GOVERMENT!

Things see a little tied up so ill make the sign.

TO BE CONTINUED!

Min-HARARHAHRHRAHRARHAHRHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHRAHHARHRAHRAHAR!


	2. MISTY TIME

Min-ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Sora-Well...will I walk the plank or not? I should ask my concience.

Min-concience?

Sora-Hmm...hes not here. Where could he be?

------

Jimminy Cricket-When you wish apon a star it doesnt matter who you are...

Hitler- :)

Jimminy Cricket-Except you.

Hitler- :(

------

Sora-Oh well. Min!

Min-Yah!

Sora-Your flys down!

Min-But these pants dont have a fly! Where'd he go?

-------

Sora-I jumped in the water! Ha! Nothing can get me now.

Bruce-Hello...Im from finding nemo.

Sora-Hi Bruce!  
Bruce-Now I dont eat fish or humans. But manga I do eat!  
Sora-So?  
Bruce-You're manga!  
Sora-AHHHHH!

--------

Kari-Are we there yet?  
Riku-No.

Kari-Are we there yet?  
Riku-No.

Kari-Are we not there yet?  
Riku-No.

Kari-Yay!

Riku-Shut up!  
Kari- :(

Donald-(is back in gummi ship) Im ok! (gummi ship blows up)

Riku-Dumb butt.

Kari-Lets consult the map!

So they look at the map and see they're headed for the bermuda triangle.

Riku-We'll go through the triangle thing!  
Kari-First...intermission!

----------

Goofy-HYUCKZ! Today im here with micky mouse!  
Mickey-...I hate my life.

Goofy-Now micky is that a knife you just shoved into yourself?  
Mickey-...

Goofy-I guess he really does hate his life!  
Mikey-Wheres Minnie? I want her to walk under a ladder.

Goofy-But thats bad lu-

Mickey-And than for it to collapse on her.

Goofy-GARWSH!

Minnie-Hi mickey! oooo...a ladder!  
Goofy-Ill save you! (grabs ladder and throws it at minnie)

Minnie-1..2..3...4...stars around my head. Hi sparkly elves!1one!eleven!1!eleventy-hundred!1!onehundred!cheese!1! (passes out)

----------

Riku-That was unneccessary!  
Kari-HAHAHHAHAHAHA!

Donald-Im ok! (gets eaten by sharks)

-------------

Sora-AHHHH!...AHHHHH!...AHHHHHH!  
Min-Sora! Grab hold of this rope! You'll be safe up here!

Sora grabbed teh rope and climbed up to find hundreds of daggers pointed at him.

Sora-What quality!

Simba-Sora! Use the force!  
Sora-Whats wrong with this place!  
Min-Men kill the lion!  
Simba-Ill be bach...with weapons.

Min-Gosh who writes this again?  
Sora-Some guy that lives with his mom and dad still.

Min-Huh?  
Sora-Lives with his mom and dad.

Min-Oh I get it. Hes just making us act stupid! Hes also making me say whaqt im saying right now! HARHARHAR!  
Sora-I need a life.

-------------

Goofy-MINNIE!

Mickey-Good riddance.

--------------

Min-HARHARHARHARHAR!

---------------

Riku-WHEEEEE!

---------------

Min-HARHAHRAHRAHRHAR!

-----------------

Riku-WHEEEEE!

We interrupt this brodcasting to bring you this important message from misty the cat.

Misty-Hi im soras cat! Now he used to play basketball with me. And I was the basketball.

----------------

MISTY TIME!

Misty-WHEEEEEEE!

----------------

Now back to serious mode.

Min-So...I hear Kari and that...guy are coming to save you sora!

Sora-Yup!  
Simba-Im bac-AHHH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT KNIFE? MY RIBCAGE ISNT TO CRACK LIKE THAT!

Sora-Poor Simba.

Min-Forget him.

Kari-Hi Sora!  
Sora-Hi!  
Riku-Enguarde!

Min-TOUCHE!

Kari-CHEESE!

(crickets)

Min-You're now all my slaves!

-----------------

Mickey-Goofy i've had enough of you and you're...idioticy. (throws goofy towards the sea)

----------------

Min-HARHAR(gets hit by goofy) ARGGHHH!

So min was defeated. But is this the end of the adventure? NO WAY! Plot twist!

Ot Eb Continude


	3. JK Rowling

Min woke up. He was in a small den...AH THE CRAP WITH THIS SERIOUS STUFF! He woke up sitting on a pile of dogs.

Min-Argh...

Sora-HES AWAKE!  
Riku-What will we ever do?  
Master cheif-I know! Cower in the corner!  
Kari-No lets chop his head off!  
J.K Rowling-Nice idea muggle.

Kari-Manga.

J.K Rowling-Sorry. I agree. I've got a wand right here!  
Kari-Let me try!  
J.K Rowling-No way!...lets see...HOGWARTZ HOGWARTZ!

She threw the wand at Min and it knocked him off the ship.

J.K Rowling-Now. In return for this deed ill need a cat. One named Misty.

Sora-I know a cat named Misty!  
J.K Rowling-Good! You have 2 chapters to find him!  
Sora-Here you go! (hands over cat)  
J.K Rowling-Thats a cat TOY.

Sora-Its names Misty!

J.K Rowling-Forget it.

Harry Pothead-Hello muggles!  
Kari-Harry Potter?

Pothead-Potheads the name.

Harry Pothead-Shut up pothead. Im harry Pothead!  
Sora-I get it!  
Misty-MEOW!  
J.K Rowling-I WANT THAT KITTY! (runs after misty)

Sora-We're on a ship? When did this get here?  
Riku-I want more lines!

Director-CUT CUT CUT! Sora get a life, J.K Rowling that cats dead.

Sora-MISTY!  
J.K Rowling-You're welcome.

Kari-Well now what?  
Ansem-I AM ANSEM HERE TO RUIN YOUR LIVES EVEN MORE! MUAHAHAHA!

Min-ARGGHH! Ansem and I are bros!  
Ansem-I told you to stop calling me that!  
J.K Rowling-Warthead Agtygoatyg!

She cast a spell at Min that turned him into a pimple.

Ansem-What the heck? Is that even legal?  
J.K Rowling-To my knowledge...no.

To Be Continued...

Sorry for a short chapter but ive got a live to live!


	4. Barf!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Themasterlink-We're back!

Sora-Who are you?

Themasterlink-TT...

Kairi-Shut up Sora...so you finnaly decided to actually make another chapter?

Themasterlink-(nods)

Kairi-Ill call my insurence company..

Riku-Why arent I in this one?  
Themasterlink-You are...and...just between you and me...im afraid of ticks...

Sora-OMG!  
Riku-Realy?

Themasterlink-Im dead serious. (all you readers out there I AM SERIOUS) Those things suck your blood..you think its a mosquito bite when its on your head but when the little blood sucker nails ya..you know its not.

Sora-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Kairi-Wha'd I miss?

Themasterlink-Forget it...rememeber I own square enix and disney...so these are my charecters...not...

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Sora-So what now?

Kairi-No more Min means no more story...

Ansem-Ahem...

Riku-Ansem why are you covered in ticks?  
Ansem-...Themasterlink...ILL KILL YOU!

Themasterlink-:P

J.K Rowling-Ill be off then. (jumps off ship)

Sora-We're on a ship?  
Riku-Yeah...SORA THERES A BEE ON YOUR NOSE!

Sora-No thats fluffy. He wuvs me...

Kairi-Backs away.

Ansem-Hey I pulled all the ticks off.

Sora-Wheres your skin?

Ansem-...oh gosh...this is embarrasing...

Riku-ANSEMZ NAKED!

Kairi-No he got all the skin pulled off himself...he still has his large cloak on.

Ansem-You will die!

Sora-I can touch my brain through my nose.

Ansem-Riku...Kairi...why do you hang out with him?  
Riku-Its like Billy and Mandy...

Kairi-The other people are geeks or hyper...

Ansem-But Soras both, not to mention crazy.

Riku-So?  
Ansem-Oh forget this...YOU WILL DIE!

Sora-(picks nose)  
Kairi-Im getting seasick..Sora stop picking your...(barfs)

Riku-Ewww you barfed...(barfs)

Sora-Im the man. (touches brain) Ow.

Ansem-I...I cant fight a kid like this...

Director-CUT!

------------

Anesm-YOU WILL DIE!  
Sora-Why?  
Riku-Hes evil...Sora...now...man...you...now we arent reading off the script...

Themasterlink-What script? I make this by stuff poping into my mind like what soras about to do.

Sora-(eats ansem)

Kairi-Bad boy! Spit the evil villian out!

Sora-(spits ansem out)  
Kairi-Not again...urgh...(barfs)

Riku-...ughh...(barfs and falls over ship)

Director-Themasterlink make a good script...like...a..uhmm..Moby Dick...And...Cut!

-------------

Sora-Where art thou'est whale?

Riku-Over yonder!

Kairi-What smells like a thousand ox butts?

Sora-My dearest kairi...RIKU FARTED!  
Riku-Thou is not claiming I farted are thee?

Themastwerlink-Look over yonder! Its...Moby Duck!

Sora-Oh Noes, thy whale shal'st kill us all!

Riku-Duck.

Sora-Whatever'th.

Kairi-Look over yonder hills. Moby Duck claims his kill!

Sora-Thy Duck has't just ate a million Garbage bags full o' crap. Thee shall die!

Moby Duck-(dies)

Themasterlink-That wasent moby duck. That was moby rubber ducky.

Riku-Where ar't that stupid duck?

Kairi-Over yonder edge of boat! He be barfing!

Director-Cut! It was good untill Kairi got to the barfing part! Cant we NOT have anyone barfing?  
Sora-C'oi'taint'ly.

Director-Shut up Sora. Lose the accent...and the pants.

Sora-Why? Oh..they're covered in radioactive waste.

Director-Not that...its covered in...green stuff! I hate green.

Sora-I shall paint it purple!  
Director-Screw it...lets try this again.

------------

Sora-...

Kairi-...

Riku-...

Director-Well say something!

Kairi-(barfs)  
Director-You know what...forget words...do sign language.

Sora-Me no speak english.

Kairi-Ughh...

Riku-...

?-Gentlemen...all your base are belong to us.

Riku-Whos there?

?-Its me Ansem. You forgot me! Gosh you stupid freaks with big hair.

Riku-(hits Ansem) Badmisteransem!

Sora-Who is it?  
Ansem-Me Ansem...

Sora-I bet its the candy man.

Ansem-A.N.S.E.M. Hint hint.

Sora-You are...Gir! I loved you in Invader Zim! Sing the doom song!

Ansem-IM ANSEM YOU IDIOT!

Sora-Gosh...sorry Tifa.

Ansem-Kairi...Riku...why dont you kill him?

Riku-The Director wont let us.

Ansem-But isnt Themasterlink the director?

Kairi-...

Director-You didnt hear nothin bout me liking the powerpuff girls...NOTHING!

Sora-You are the author! The one who types this crap!

Director-Its all for charity...

Kairi-Then why is this suitcase with all your money in say, "My spending lovey dovy money for lovey dovey stuff for my wuv me?"

Director-Thats...uhmm...Rikus suitcase!  
Riku-How did you know?

Sora-Congratz Themasterlink you solved the nacey drew case!

Director-Im...so...I love you...

Sora-Aww...

------------

Amasterlink-Was that the chapter?  
Sora-No.

Riku-Yes.

Kairi-I hope not.

Amasterlink-Well..I guess the villians ansem...but it has nothing to do with killing him or fighting him...

Ansem-Wha'd I miss?  
Amasterlink-Well see ya next time everyone! We might just kick Ansems butt! Probobly not though.


End file.
